Email passwords are not community property!

Every since the New York Times ran “Breaking Up In a Digital Fishbowl” this member of djv has been on a rant. It makes me absolutely crazy wondering how in the world anyone would think that sharing the password to a personal email account would be a good idea. This is not a sign of intimacy nor is it the ultimate indicator of trust. Sharing email passwords is just plain stupid.

Microsoft, Apple, McAfee and thousands of other companies specialize in computer/network security, and make millions of dollars per year in revenue. These organizations focus on keeping data protected from outside viewing. Some businesses terminate employees for sharing passwords, and corporate system administrators encourage teammates to change their passwords after work has been done on their computer. With the electronic age, globalization of work, and the need to be available 24 7, the line between our business and personal lives is extremely fuzzy. Then why, when it comes to personal email accounts, do people think that the same security measures applied to their work email don’t apply to their personal email?

There’s an attack on Google, we are shocked and scared. We worry about protecting our online identity, but don’t take the most basic steps at home. What’s that about?

This member of djv took a survey and asked some of her guy pals if they had the password to their wives’ or girlfriend’s email. Unanimously they said “no”.

There are so many reasons to have your own private email. This is not about trying to hide something. It’s about having your own identity. Having your own private email supports the relationship. Why? Because, at least to me, a strong relationship consists of two individuals who share beliefs and interests and give of themselves while also pursing their own activities as individuals. Email is a dominant method of communication today, so how could you plan a thoughtful surprise party or present for your honey when they have access to your email? Perhaps you want to get a friend’s impression on your reaction to a situation, or ask for some ideas on how to handle something. We all need to vent to get our emotions in check. It’s far better for your relationship if your sweetheart sees you after your venting period when you can talk about your emotions in a non defensive manner. In this kind of situation, access to your email account can automatically lead to saying stuff you regret later.

There are some caveats. If you are married and have joint accounts, yes you are both entitled to the passwords. This member of djv is a huge advocate for joint as well as individual bank accounts and credit cards, but that’s for another post.

There’s a ton more to go into on this topic. In the meantime we'd love to hear your thoughts.

djv